Archive for December, 2007
Protected: Dreams
Saturday, December 15th, 2007I asked my sweetheart what lies ahead…
Friday, December 14th, 2007Oh the reading day. I’ve seriously got to get to studying. Today has gone by rather quickly- it’s already dark out. I woke up and cleaned the house up a bit. Not too much, though, because honestly, I’m probably going to clean like a fiend before Christmas and visitors, etc. But before I got to homework I felt like I had to do the requisite amount of reading crap on the internet, and of course, let everyone know the newest news.
I was hired on full-time with Rich and Ron again yesterday. This time, though, it’s the real-deal…salaried, insurance (for both John and me), etc. I worked full-time with them through the summer (starting right after finals last-semester) and went part time when school started again. We were able to finish the first draft of the book and started the second pass-through this last couple of months. A month or so ago I started asking whether or not they would still have the position come January, and R&R said they wanted to see how everything went before making a decision. I was getting a bit anxious- mostly because I realised that I couldn’t be stupid and just wait to see how it all turned out, I had to start getting my resume out there again. In the end, I’ve decided that I’m very glad to be staying where I am and excited to see where it all goes. I’m excited to graduate and work full-time. It’ll be good to focus on 27 things in life instead of 43,984.
I am waiting to hear from Westminster, so that’s a part of the plan. I’m also toying with the idea of a Greek class. I know that sounds random, but all of a sudden I’m thinking about theology again. As in, studying it. I’m thinking about ethics and books and lectures and all the things that I choose my first undergraduate university for. Who know’s where it’ll go. But, if I decide to go that route, I’m going to need Greek. ANYWAY. That is all so up in the air right now.
I actually had a freak out the other night because I realised, even after all this time, and as I GRADUATE, I still don’t know what I want to do with my life. I’ve always worked- and pretty much plan on working throughout different seasons of my life. But here’s the thing- I don’t just want to fit into some job description. I want to take my skills and interests and find a job that describes me. Last week the girl upstairs came down to ask me for some help with her philosophy paper- and as I explained stuff and we talked it out, I felt more excited about philosophy than I had in a long, long time. I still feel an inclination to teach. But the things I want to teach are not taught in high schools. I’d definitely need higher education- and although I don’t mind the idea of it, I don’t think right now is the time to start another academic degree. Thus, a few months off. Thus, starting a communications program to learn some skills. Mad Skilz. John has been working the dreaded job for quite some time now- and it’ll be really nice for him to reduce his hours (he’s been keeping a set amount to keep our insurance) so that he can focus on getting done with school. Fingers crossed- next time this year it’ll be John graduating, and then we can figure out life from there.
But, with all that dreaming in the works (work, Greek, communications, la la la) I’ve still got a week of finals to get through first. So here goes some studying. Now….if only the girl upstairs would stop baking. It smells toooo gooooddd…..
Real Books
Thursday, December 13th, 2007So…we’re standing in Border’s about to buy Coraline, by Neil Gaiman when this girl behind us in line, looking at all the little inspriational books on a swivelling displays exclaims:
(insert best Utah accent here) “Oh my gosh. This book is so lame. Don’t they even write real books anymore?”
It was all I could do from saying,”Um, turn around.”
Poor girl didn’t know that to find REAL books you have to venture further than the front few feet of the store. I wonder what she thought all those papery-rectangular things with words in them were, anyway. I guess they didn’t look enough like her favorite classic of all time: Elmo Goes Camping. It’s hard to compete.
A Changin’
Thursday, December 13th, 2007Ta Da. Last philosophy class last night. I didn’t really think about it until I went in and sat down- but then all of a sudden it dawned on me that except for a few finals related things- I was done with classes at BYU. I am done with classes for my undergraduate degree.
It was kind of funny. Halfway through the first hour Dr. Anderson started talking about the theory of correspondence. He used a triangle as an example of what he was trying to say, and I leaned over to the guy sitting next to me and said, “At least he didn’t use a chair.” You see- in metaphysical lectures of ANY KIND professors almost always say, “Take this chair for example…” and then go into a long thing about how it exists, or does it, is it in our minds, does it simply participate in “chair-ness,” etc. Metaphysics (the study of being) is actually rather important (used to be “first philosophy,” the one you have to study to be able to study anything else. Now, for better or for worse, the philosophy of language has usurped the position, at least in the minds of some philosophers). I’ve never like metaphysics. I would have loved to concentrate on ethics, or even epistemology, but although Scranton offered tons of classes in those areas, BYU…not so much. ANYWAY. So the guy next to me laughs about the chair thing…and sure enough, a couple minutes later Dr. Anderson says, “So, think about a chair, for instance.” And the whole back row cracks up. When I got in the car after class and told John, he said, “At least you came full circle.” Yes. Yes I did. But is that a perfect circle? And does it exist in reality, or in the world of the forms?
Moving on….So yes. Finals are closer than ever. I definitely have my work cut out for me. I think John has a couple of big things left, too, not the least of which is our biology class final. Good times. Gotta study. On the up side, I thought my William James paper was due Wednesday and got it done Monday night (which was early..honestly) and then it turns out it’s not due until Monday during the final. Which is crazy. Because I’ve never been this early. PHEW. So I have time to revise and make it AWESOME .
Last night John and I were meant to go to his work holiday celebration- tubing somewhere up the canyon. His office was closed for the night, so we’d have the whole evening together. Turns out John felt not-so-well yesterday, so we decided that I’d just go to class and then we’d have a relaxing evening at home. It was kind of nice, actually. Reminds me of ollldd times. We walked around Borders and talked a bit, then ate dinner at Bajio. I heart Bajio- and it was nice and empty and dark and nice tasty food. A good date. Then we went to Wal*Mart to get some finishing touches for a box we made for some certain people we love, and then came home. We got to bed before John usually gets home (which was the goal, take advantage of some SLEEP) and resultantly, I woke up in a supa funk this morning. Don’t you love how the body freaks when you suddenly get a healthy amount of sleepy time?
Last night was so nice because we got to just talk- about books, about movies, about work and Christmas and family. We get so busy and even when we’re together we’re not together…so it’s nice when we actually just get to focus on what the other person is saying. After Christmas things are gonna change a bit again. Because we’ve taken this long class together on MWF, we’ve been able to spend most of the daytime during those days driving to school together, sitting in class, getting lunch. When I go full-time, whether my current job is made full-time or I take another opportunity, I’ll be 9am-5pm at work, he’ll be in school in the daytime, then 5-10pm at work himself. So it looks like we’ll have an hour or so of overlap in the evening sometime…after eating and before passing out. It’s kind of sad. But that’s life- we just gotta get this boy graduated, too so the picture can change again, and so we can see each other in the evenings again.
Life is good. It’s actually very, very good. I’m a bit spoiled, honestly. I just need to remind myself of that sometimes.
Next Top Model
Tuesday, December 11th, 2007I try and make a seductive face, and start to giggle.
“I hate that face. I can never do seductive faces.”
“You don’t trust your seductive face. You have to learn to just go with it.”
“Wow, that was deep. You’ve been watching too much America’s Next Top Model.”
“Yes. Yes I have.”
(In all fairness, he’s only watching it because I’m obsessed. And we only have one TV.)
What IS that?
Tuesday, December 11th, 2007I’m sitting here minding my own business, just having some chocolate and diet coke, and all of a sudden I hear this noise.
eee-uuhuh-eeee, gurgle gurlge, eeeeee.
“Whatever can that be?” I think to myself. But pay no more heed.
A few minutes later, I hear it again:
eeeeeeeeeeeuhuhuhuheeeeeegurgleeeeeeeee.
“Hmmm……..Anyway.”
Finally- I can’t ignore it. So I turn down Gilmore Girls and just listen. Is it carbonation leaving my coke can? I hold it to my ear and shake. No. Is it some sort of brain gurgle, escaping through my ears? As far as can be ascertained…no. And finally I zero in. The salsa bottle. It is just open enough that salsa-y-air is escaping soooo slowly. I tightened the cap.
Carl’s Junior
Tuesday, December 11th, 2007So. Carl’s Junior has mystified me once again. I have to say, before I moved to Utah, I had never in my life heard of Carl’s Junior. Anyway. I’ve always been bugged by their advertising. There’s this one of this slightly hot trucker chick eating a taco salad with her fingers. And then there’s this other one with a surfer eating a sloppy sloppy burger while watching a plastic hula girl dance on his dashboard. All of this kind of makes me associate their burgers with soggy napkins and sex. Ew.
Lately, though, they’ve changed their tactic. They’ve got this whole, “Don’t bother me, I’m having lunch” deal going on. They show car salesmen and teams working in office buildings. Then, they took it a weird step too far. They’ve got this HUGE burger with mushrooms on it that they call the “Six Dollar Burger.” When I saw that I thought to myself: wow, that’s a crap load of money for one burger. Apparently the rest of the world thought the same thing, because the next time I saw a commercial it was a similar situation, business guys sitting around, except this time they were all paying the guy who bought the burgers making comments like, “Wow. What did this set you back? $20?” And the guy’s mouth is full of amazing portabella burger and isn’t able to clarify, “NO, this is the 6 DOLLAR burger, ONLY,” and so he gets a 20 off of every guy there. How charming. I was convinced. And as if that weren’t enough- they’ve started saying things like, “The kind of burger you can get at those other places for $20- but at Carl’s Junior- it’s about $5. The 6 Dollar burger.” Is it…about $5….or is it $6…..I think that Carl’s Junior is recruiting their advertising team out of middle school.
You Actually Need to Know Something
Monday, December 10th, 2007What a weekend. I’m not really sure where it went…especially as we didn’t even leave the house that often. I think I’m finally on the last leg of this sickness. I’m not coughing so much, and I slept through the night without my vaporizer. Which is good. It did take me quite a long time to fall asleep last night, though, during which time I wrote a story in my head about a girl who gets sick and is watching the steam rise from the vaporizer next to her bed until it turns dark grey- and it turns out that there is a dragon under her bed, and HE’S got a cold, TOO! I’ll have to write some of these things down one day.
John and I finished editing the movie yesterday! That was more labor intensive than I thought it’d be. But turns out I really love iMovie. (Remind me, why did I buy a PC again? Good thing my husband bought a MAC.) I ended up enjoying the experience so much…that I named my short iLove. Haha. It’s about two people who lead boring/uneventful lives, chat online, fall in love, and finally decide that they need to get out of cyber space and into REAL space. I like how it came out. Of course, it’s no where near professional and there are maybe…a hundred things I’d do differently next time (more establishing shots….please) but I’m proud of my first venture into film making. I already wrote the final papers for that class- so it looks like just the final remains there.
In other news: I have a very sweet brother. I called him yesterday morning to see if he could give us a ride to church, because my car was snowed in and we thought John’s was as well. He had been called into work, though- and when Jonathan says, “I’m at work” he could be anywhere in Provo or the surrounding areas. He got a job working landscaping for the summer- and his hard work earned him a spot doing winter snow removal. We did get John’s car out after all, and went to church, and came home, and decided to take a nap before tackling the snow outside. When we woke up, WA LA. The snow was gone! Jonathan was driving home from his day when he saw that we had still not shoveled ourselves out…and stopped to do it himself. What a sweet, sweet boy. Gotta love the kid.
Today was a good day in classes- only Wednesday left! Tomorrow is work (and probably a lot of catch up in that arena, seeing as how I was sick last week) and then my very last day of actually attending classes at BYU is on Wednesday. I’m happy to see it come, I gotta tell ya. Today we went to a very interesting lecture meant for faculty by a visiting speaker named Daniel Robinson from Oxford who spoke about, among other things, reason and faith. What was very interesting is that he gave a couple of warnings to students that I especially appreciated. He said that it’s all well and good for our ideals and our principles to be important to us- and they can be combined and considered within the scope of all kinds of disciplines, including science and literature, but you need to be ready. He said, “It isn’t enough to have the right sentiment. It isn’t enough to have the right scripture. You’ll meet people who don’t care about your scripture. You must have the right argument.” While you could argue about needing the right “argument” with regard to a faith discussion, anyone who wishes to be a part of the academic world, or have/voice an opinion about something needs to be a part of the world in that way.
I want to make myself clear- when I use the word “argue,” I don’t mean it in the sense of an argument from anger or contention. I mean that in order to make an educated point you must understand the other side, be able to listen and honestly consider someone else’s thoughts while sharing your own- based on thoughtful reflection and reason, not emotion. Anyway. It was a good time.
So…tonight. Still writing that paper. Stupid paper…one of John’s presents arrived today, so I got to wrap it and put it under our tree. I LOVE Christmas! Time for writing….
Winter Wonderland
Saturday, December 8th, 2007SNOWY! This day has been so snowy :) I love it. I woke up kinda early (ish) and saw my esthetician…who I think is pregnant. Don’t you hate that? When you’re not sure if someone is pregnant or not, and it’s OBVIOUS they have a cute little pregnant belly but they haven’t said anything, and the only question you can think to ask is something like, “So. How’s being pregnant?” Maybe you are smoother than me. So I didn’t say anything…I just tried to check her out whenever she walked away. Which I’m sure made me look like some kind of freak- peering over the table whenever she left me there, craning my neck to try and see. Haha. Then, just as I was paying, she came out and put her hand on her belly. YES. Pregnant. I LOVE talking about people being pregnant. I should’ve asked. But whatever. Maybe it’s like being blonde, or Mormon. Sure, most people know, but do you have to talk about it ALL THE TIME? I realised that she’s probably been pregnant the whole time I’ve known her. I first saw her for my face before the wedding. I would go to her for facials and for other little girl necessities, and I immediately felt comfortable around her. Congratulations her.
After that I came home John and I lounged around a bit and just talked. It was nice- I love those days when it seems like we just laugh and talk and learn secrets about each other. I had to bribe him with one of my secrets to get a specific one out of him. But in the end, I think we BOTH knew a bit more about each other. It’s fun to know each other so well, and still have things we’ve never talked about before. I love having this other person in my life, full of his own preferences and experiences and stories.
After that we ran to the grocery store before we got snowed in. When we came home I cleaned a bit while John tried to do some writing. I feel bad that I’ve distracted him so badly all week being sick- but I think he’s gotten a few things done. It took me FOREVER to clean our house today, though. I didn’t do it my usual “order,” so that’s probably why. But it is done- all except the laundry…that is. Still working that out.
I just finished my lesson for the kids at church tomorrow- and now we’re going to cook some yummy dinner. THEN it’s paper time!! Yessss……
I wish I had a river, that I could skate away on…
Friday, December 7th, 2007TWO MORE DAYS OF CLASSES. It hit me today- the realization. I’m almost done! Tonight I need to write a paper and or study for one of my finals. I’ve decided to stop thinking about the online course for a few days- as THAT is actually the LAST thing I’ll need to have done to finish my degree. Take a deep breath, and MOVE FORWARD.
I did get out of bed today in time to go to our science class- even though I coughed all the way through it. It was a visiting professor speaking about evolution. He brought up so many interesting things that I had never considered before. Specifically, he talked about the differences between human skull structure and the skull structure of different types of monkeys. Very, very interesting. Apparently, although simian life has the brain capacity for speech, their anatomy doesn’t allow for it. Also, we looked at human chromosomes compared to chimpanzees and bonobos. They are crazy the same, and have really interesting markers that indicate all kinds of crazy things. It was a fascinating lecture- and while I still need to process the information and figure out what it means with regard to all my other beliefs…I feel more educated as a result of the things that we learned. And, I now have another book I want to check out.
SO. I’ve finished my shopping for John for Christmas! We settled on an amount of money to spend…and then I did something I’ve never done before. I went onto Amazon.com- and did all the shopping there. I even got the one thing I saw that I LOVED for my Mom, and am considering getting the rest of our presents for the rest of our meager list on there too. I’ve made a few decisions with regard to Christmas. FIRST of all- no cards this year. With one or two exceptions, we’re going to skip this year, mostly as a by-product of the fact that I’m STILL writing and sending thank you cards for wedding gifts. Second of all, gifts are going to be simple. I don’t see the need to spend a whole lot of money in shipping gifts to everyone- I’d rather call and chat and just get in touch with the people I love who are far away. Plus, not gonna lie, we have plenty of money for rent and insurance and food and a movie here and there…but not much more. Ah the life of poor college students.
For a few Christmas’s I’ve felt a little lost in all of it. Before my mission I remember feeling a little weird about the holidays, wondering if I’d ever feel the magic of it all again. When I was on my mission I felt liberated from the pressure of perfect decorations and loads of presents- and then when I got home, it was just amazing to be with my family again. This year- I’m so excited to have my OWN new family! It’s been fun deciding to do things our way- pick our tree, our decorations, where we’re going to be, all of that. And it’s fun to have my parents coming to visit ME :) I just hope we have room for everyone to be comfortable in our little apartment! I’ve realised that although presents are fun, limiting that aspect of it is good, because it’s so easy to get carried away. I want it to be about family and food and feeling the Spirit of it all. I remember the Christmases from when I was little. All the grandparents and Aunts and Uncles and Cousins. Good thing I married into a big family! Now we just have to see if we ever have a holiday all together. I would love that. I’ll have to work pretty hard to make that happen…with my family in Massachusetts and Connecticut and Europe (to name a few), and John’s in Mississippi and Utah and Colorado (and then some! His parent’s will spend this Christmas in AZ on a mission!).
Just as a side-note, though, a lot easier to buy John Christmas gifts THIS year as compared to last year! I forget what I got him…I think some socks last year. Haha. It was kind of a joke gift. HOW CAN I KEEP THE PRESENTS A SECRET? I’ll try. I’ll try try try!!!
OK. Time for some homework.
