Nothing makes me maudlin like the smell of September. Even the light seemed different this morning, and it made me reminisce and become a little sad. To be precise, this is my second September with no school. LAST September, though, I was awaiting the arrival of my Camper. And I think that is a big enough change to distract anyone from any sort of unfulfilled scholastic longing. I longed to give birth. That was about it.
I’m not sure that this excess in sentimentality is altogether my fault. I think that we have been fully conditioned to expect different changes as different times, and September has always been the time for new shoes, the time when you can run outside and play and not get too hot. The time when the days are shorter and evenings become more cozy, and when you have things to read at night and places to go in the morning. My first September morning as a full-fledged SAHM has made me totally and completely realize that I really do want to go to school every single September of the rest of my life. That was nice to figure out. So I guess it’s time to get my butt into school after all. Someday soon.
That said, I don’t get to go to school today. In strange Erin-land, it actually felt like a holiday I was missing out on. I am jealous of the kids I know who have to get up, eat breakfast, and get on a bus. I’m even MORE jealous of the slightly dazed young adults I’ve seen standing in line at Target for about a month, holding trashcans and bathroom rugs, freshly dressed in the sweatshirt they bought at ortientation. I don’t have a new bag and I didn’t go to Staples last week. I don’t have a schedule to print out or a campus to explore. But sitting in the living room this morning, holding my baby close as we watched Blues Clues and playing trucks on the floor- I realized that I shouldn’t DARE wish this time away or feel like I’m missing out. It was chilly enough this morning that I put him in one of the bathrobes we’ve had for him for forever. Although it seemed silly to put them on him when he was a baby, sitting in his bouncy chair covered in blankets, my “baby” is almost a toddler. And the trim little robe kept right up with him as he scooted all over the living room this morning. I ordered him some mukluks- soft and flexible so that he can crawl in them. I hope they fit him! We got him some long pants and pretty soon I get to think about Halloween costumes again.
There are so many Septembers left for school- but how many Septembers will I have when my baby is almost one?
So that’s that. I’ve cleaned up a yucky poopy diaper, glad that I bought that sprayer after all. (Thank you, applesauce.) I will maneuver my way through naptime, figure something out for lunch. Maybe we’ll go to the library and read books, or go for a walk and try to find some red and yellow leaves. Work on walking holding one hand. I’ve missed out on Fall in this part of the country for about….4 years? now? Maybe more? It’s going to be a good month. I’m going to do everything in my power to make it one.
Tags: Camper, SAHMedness, School, September
Awwww… I don’t get to help you with the costume this year. This makes me soooo sad as I feel like I should get to be a bigger part of his life. Darn all those states between us…