John is cracking me up. He keeps looking through people on Facebook and saying things like,
“I don’t know why he’s in my friend suggestion list. He’s very chubby.” (I don’t think the chubby is the reason why he wonders, he’s fine with chubby people. More of a non-sequitur, really. He was illustrating his lack of understanding of Facebook’s algorithm that allows them to match people. His words. Not mine.)
“Look at her super-rectangular head.”
and
“I think she has lazy eye-lids.”
Hahahahahahaha.
Most days motherhood feels like a sacred obligation, a blessing, a fulfillment. And that’s exactly what it is. But regardless of what it is or isn’t, some days motherhood kicks you in the face. When a woman becomes a mother there is a sense of excitement. It’s like when you get your first “salaried” position. It’s mature, it’s the next thing, it a big step. But although there are a thousand and one good things that accompany your new responsibility, you suddenly realize that it requires more hours than you’re used to working, you get paid less, and more often than not you have to “take one for the team.”
Ouch.
Today my son went on a sleep strike. Again. He also ate and crawled like a fiend. He did a lot of wiggling, slapping and pinching. Minimal biting. I am reminded of my first impression of him as he exited the womb. Bull dog. Seriously. He seemed determined and serious, even at birth. Even with his strength, he was sick. All the other infants in the NICU were tiny and fragile. My son was ripping out his breathing tube and glaring at the nurses that drew his blood. He ate almost vengefully. He was strong, and I was amazed by his personality. And that personality (it really did impress me in the beginning, I know it sounds negative but I was and am completely enamored of my BullDog Baby) has grown with him. He’s got an incredibly sweet side as well, he loves to cuddle and give kisses and can be almost thoughtful, even so young. He silly and loves to laugh and I can tell sometimes that he wants nothing more than to make me proud …but he’s just so STRONG and WILLFUL. So tonight, after wrestling him to bed and giving him a hundred deflected kisses, after Daddy took a go at him and calmed him down a bit more, after “one more” bottle and when he was finally calm, I tickled him to sleep just because I can. And because my baby’s tough guy face was not the last one I was going to see him make tonight.
So our weekend was a little bit restful, but mostly just lame-o. We watched a couple of movies and some TV, took naps (Camper took a nap from about 10am til 12pm on Saturday, lovely) and did a wee bit of cleaning. The thing about not spending lots of money is that it takes some effort to entertain yourself. If you feel too tired or lack the enthusiasm to figure it out, you end up doing nothing. Among our biggest “lame” things of this past weekend was a trip to Wendy’s. Yes. We went OUT to eat, and it was a huge mistake. All I really wanted was something fun to do- a la try and give Camper brain freeze by giving him his first bites of Frosty. We ended up eating dinner there, which turned out to be pretty gross, actually…and too expensive…and then I spilled my drink all over me (chilly) and they forgot to give us our Frosty altogether. Totally and completely not worth it. But was the money worth the lesson?
Camper is now crawling all over the place, pulling himself up on everything and getting into every crevice he can find. While this is not lame at all, it IS pretty exhausting, and I find myself wishing that he’d get ahold of himself and stop landing on his head. Poor kid. Clumsy one. Right now he’s smiling at the sun shining through his clear green bouncy ball. When he’s not cranky and teething, he is in love with life. It’s kind of nice to watch.
Just now I caught Bubb’s hightailing it around the back of the couch escaping into the other room. I went to get him (one of his legs was out of his PJs, and he was trailing the empty leg behind him. One legg-ed Camper kid) and set him back in the living room. Then I went to get something to block up the escape route, and by the time I came back (TWO SECONDS) he had pulled himself up on the couch and grabbed this here laptop. Oh my.
Last night John and I missed our finance meeting, so I have nothing to report until we get to it later today. I think we both spaced it, probably had something to do with our son who was HYSTERICAL for about an hour. I’m not really sure why, I think it’s exhaustion, but every once in awhile lately he loses it…screaming and sobbing and whatnot. John and I took turns rocking him and singing to him, but he acted like something was biting him. He finally went to sleep and John and I were both so exhausted we ate dinner and then went to bed ourselves.
Another thing I haven’t blogged about yet (mostly because I hoped it would pass quicker than I could blog it) is the fact that Camper no longer sleeps through the night. We had a few good weeks, but ever since his last doctor’s appointment when she said, “He may start waking up at night to play” he started waking up again. Here’s the thing, he doesn’t want to play. She specifically said that as he gets older he’ll wake up and want to hang out with us for a little while. But he is in no way interested in us, he just wants food. He’ll make a few noises that escalate into full on screams if I don’t go get him and feed him. He’ll eat a bottle and go right back to sleep. Once again, it’s the only time he’ll down an entire bottle in just a couple minutes, and then he wants right back into his crib and get more sleep. He’s sleeping from 7pm to 6:30am, waking around 11pm and then again around3am. There is some variation in there, but you get the idea. His waking also coincides with the advent of his crawling. My personal opinion is that he is using more energy and simply gets hungry. So I guess until I can figure out how to feed him enough that he feels full all night long, he’ll continue to wake up. I won’t let him cry if he seems hungry, I just won’t.
So as for now, it’s a couple late-night feedings for us again. Less sleep all around.
Fun times.
So I have this philosophy. It’s born from watching lots of moms with healthy, happy sons, and lots of babysitting experience. (I always babysat boys for some reason. I had a few weekly jobs that I did for years, and one mom would pay me above and beyond what anyone else did to secure my time for her four boys. I knew why she paid so much after she had to show me the “right” way to restrain her oldest child when he threw fits and after her second oldest locked me in his bedroom one night. Super sneaky child that one. I actually had a lot of fun with those boys, and they were boys.)
This is my philosophy: WEAR THEM OUT.
I think that there are definitely kids who need medication for different things, I’m not all Tom Cruise about mental health issues…but I think that as a society (and in the public school system) we tend to overstimulate a child’s brain while not teaching him how to use up all of his energy. Then we get surprised that they can’t sit still during a lesson or a book. Just like our food can be over-fortified (find me a food without extra vitamin C or DHA or SOMETHING in it, and I’ll be quite surprised) our activities can sometimes have too many agendas. We want our kids to learn sign language, counting, reading, colors…WHATEVER…and in order to attain this goal we turn all of their games and toys into “learning opportunities.” Sometimes a kid just has to play.
Here is an analogy that prove I do too much laundry. Children are like little washing machines. We make sure our kids get plenty of rest and eat good food and all of this equates to the machine filling with water and starting the agitation process. However, if we miss that final spin cycle, the water will just sit and cause problems. Making sure our kids exert themselves physically is like letting the water out, getting that last bit of energy out and making room for more, fresh energy later.
So yesterday I wore my kid out. We went on a bike ride, we played in the backyard, then we went for a swim. He still took his naps and ate his meals, but in between we got outside, got in the water, and stayed busy. Not only did he nap like a champ yesterday, but he also slept from 7pm to 4am, ate and went back to sleep until 6:30am. But here’s the problem.
I was SHATTERED by the end of the day. I woke up today and couldn’t imagine doing any more of the same. How am I supposed to keep this up? I think as he gets more independent I’ll be able to sit in the backyard and enjoy a book while he runs around and plays in the sandbox. (I’m planning on getting a sandbox as soon as he stops eating everything.) Maybe I can host a playgroup and let the other kids wear him out sometimes. But all I know is that he seemed happier, slept better, and is crawling faster and faster.
He’s also enjoying the pool more, but I’ll post about THAT a little later.
I even noticed that when we sat down with a book after a lot of physical activity, he was more likely to sit quietly and look at the book with me. It can’t be bad for me, either, right? All I know is that with how much John and I enjoy TV, movies, and computer…I better make sure we get the kid outside. He’s already in love with all things luminous or buttonous.
So here’s my plan. Do everything that I can do. If we are both tired at the end of the day, I did something right. I’m going to help my son learn to play hard, not be afraid of getting dirty of getting his face wet, and make sure that we both get a little rest when we need it. (Rainy days are good for that, no?) I’m thinking of getting a kiddy pool so that he can splash around even on days that I don’t feel like getting in, and like I said, the sandbox will come as soon as he stops putting everything in his mouth. I think it’ll be super fun when he starts to walk and I can bring him to the playground.
Just as a final aside, when we were in Albany a couple of weeks ago we entered and exited that mall through a sporting goods store. At one point I looked down an aisle and saw a woman with two boys and her husband looking at equipment of some kind. She was wearing comfortable clothes (watch out Stacey and Clinton!), didn’t wear a lot of makeup or do anything extraordinary with her hair, and looked rather unremarkable when it came to fashion or cuteness. My first thought was, “I wonder if having all boys in the house means you can’t wear cute clothes anymore.” But then I saw her boys (husband included) looking at her and talking with her about some activity they were going to start doing. The look in their eyes was unmistakable, they were enamored of her. While it’s fun to to a “pretty mommy,” and I’m never going to stop painting my toes or getting haircuts…if my son can look at me like that and know that I’ll play with him, whatever it is he decides he likes the play, then I’ll be happy. Very happy. Very tired probably…but very happy, too.
Yesterday was rough, but Camper is back to passing out with a little grin/minimal fussing. I think that the trip messed him up a wee, but one day of toughing out a little more “cry it out” and he’s back to going to sleep well. STAYING asleep, now that’s another story. We’re back to sleepus interruptus, totally fun, and I think a product of not eating enough during the day. I would give my left pinkie toe to the person who can get my son to eat a full bottle a few times a day, but alas. We’re just going with the flow. He LOVES solid food- so much so that I’ve added proteins- starting with pureed chicken. It takes like poultry paste, but he went ga ga over it, so I’m guessing it’s a good addition. Other things we’ll work into his diet this month: yogurt, cottage cheese, cheese in general, hummus, beans, meats of all types, tofu (if I can figure that one out) and eventually (last because it’s a big allergy food) eggs…I still refuse to give him juice unless he’s not pooping. It’s just not necessary, and with his tendency to not drink his formula, I don’t want to waste his fluid on sugar water. I also put formula powder into his food all day long. It’s in his oatmeal, in his rice cereal, in his sweet potatoes…I have to get it in while I can.
So I ask you, Moms, do your babies eat their recommended amount of formula each day? If not, do you worry about it or just give them food like they’re begging for? I know of at least one mommy blogger who talks about her baby kind of self-weaning, eventually preferring mostly solid food during the day. I think we’re headed in that direction, Camper.
Today was spent doing laundry, doing pre-packing for baby’s first plane trip. I’m seriously nervous about how he’ll be (i.e. SLEEP) on the plane. The ONLY time my kid screams is when he’s overtired and can’t relax. Airplane + tons of strangers + complete lack of crib might be very very bad for him. It could be just fine. Let’s hope for just fine. In the meantime, I’m trying to “streamline” packing efforts, bringing the exact amount of everything I need, avoiding unessential items, and wondering how much I’ll need my computer while I’m gone. Would you all miss me? Would I have time for blogging anyway? I know what I NEED to fix this problem, but not yet. Not til our contract is up in September. Oh yeah, and not until we pay off this trip to Utah that we can’t afford.
Yeah.
